6:53pm: Showers make everything about 20 bagillion times better.

Jen isn't responding to any of the emails i've sent her, or anyone elses to my knowledge. it's kind of.. iritating.

"we're sending you out on this experience and you haave to keep in contact with us, but we won't do shit to keep in contact with you. even if your emails/phone calls are actually important"

yeah. I'd really like to know if they've found anything out about my second walkabout. and I'm kind of upset that i'm not getting a response of any sort from anyone. ...

but. in better news, i put my entire ipod on random and have been listening to some of the most crazy songs ever.

it's fantastic.



I think that things will be better once I get home.

not just me missing people. I just think that things will get better.

or maybe it's just a very hopeful ... something.


i'm sleepy.


i miss my boy.







i can update two journals in two hours. I'm amazing.

12:08pm:

You scored as Goth. That's awesome! Go you! </td> Goth 47% Stoner 40% "Ghetto" 40% Punk 40% Hot 40% Emo Kid 40% Prep 33% Geek/Nerd 33% Jock 20% Loner 13% What Highschool Clique Do You Belong To? created with QuizFarm.com

so... no.

10:32pm: ( i <3 this song )

6:33am: I'm Tired.

I'm crampy.

I feel sick to my stomach.

My dad keeps yelling at me to do things.

It's only 6:30 in the morning.

And i'm leaving at 9.

and... on top of all that... myspace is down. [haha]

to everyone i didn't manage to see before i left, I'm going to miss you all and I love you all, and just imagine that i'm giving you super hugs when you read this.

to everyone i did see, I'll miss you and i love you and hound dogz was a blast.

Rikki, I'm so sorry i didn't get to see you at work, i didn't even end up leaving until 9:00 last night.

to the FJ's, I'm sad i didn't get to join you for one more Poject Runway... I promise i'll watch it on wednesdays and think of you. [partially because i think i'm a little addicted to it.....]


Anyways. I will miss you all dearly, but i'll see you sooner than i expect.

1:40am: I have the best boy in the world. even if he forces me into interesting situations that turn out better than expected.

( too many surveys )

9:58pm: I had this master plan...
I was going to get home from karate and take a shower.

right after that, i was going to go straight to bed, because i need sleep.





but the sink was still clogged. so i had to wait.

and then it got unclogged.

and now the dishwasher is on. and it's 10:00.

and hour later than i wanted.


i smell terrible, and i just want to sleep. :\

10:13pm: ( quizzes )

P.S. Sorry to those who i didn't call on new years. i started to... then I got distracted...

1:45am: I have seen way too much of the worthington [and other] police recently...

this should stop.

but tonight was worth it.

10:30am: What is this boy doing to me?

10:59pm: I have decided that I don't update this enough.

though that's not going to change any time soon... here is a quiz!!



BLUE


??Which colour of Death is yours??
brought to you by Quizilla


Two cops at speedway, a girl eating a sub, and a boy standing watching a girl eat a sub. along with the person working. wonder what that looked like to the customers.

but it was damn fun.



and now my dad's making me go to bed.

see. it's not my fault i never update!! [i am full of lies]

1:15am: Soda slushies, code red, and a little somethin on the side can never go wrong.


I hope that these cookies appear tomorrow.



I want a new speedboat...

9:40pm: I am very angry with my father right now.

but my dog walked over to the back door with a tennis ball in her mouth all slow and cute like, and dropped it. then looked at me, looked at the door, looked at the tenis ball, and then looked back at me and whimpered.

i can;t stay mad when something like that happens...

i love my dog.

6:29pm: I like a boy and he doesn't know.

But i might see him tonight, so it's exciting.









school needs to suck my dick.

I think that my walkabout is going to work out. and i'm psyched.





oh. and my dad is FORCING me to go to colorado for christmas. He bought the ticket after telling me i could stay home. I can't stay at the gardners because he's not comfortable with them. I can't stay in Ohio at all. I am literally being forced to see my family, and while i love my family, i was excited to stay home for once in my fucking life. I just wanted to stay in ohio. that's all i wanted to do. but i can't. because my dad "isn't comfortable with me staying here" and he "wants me to be with family".

Hey dad. why don't you just follow through on a deal you made with you daughter and listen to her when she wants something!

5:58am: I told Wayne that I got accepted to Columbus State today...

as a result, he threw his coffee at me.

6:17am:
AMPHIBIOUS BOATS!!

VS.




what an interestnig battle...

6:56pm: Travelling swallowing Dramamine
Feeling spaced breathing out listerine
I'd said what I'd said that I'd tell ya
And thats you'd killed the better part of me
If you could just milk it for everything
I've said what I'd said and you know what I mean
But I still can't focus on anything
We kiss on the mouth but still cough down our sleeves

Travelling swallowing dramamine
Look at your face like you're killed in a dream
And you think you've figured out everything
I think I know my geography pretty damn well
You say what you need so you'll get more
If you could just milk it for everything
I've said what I said and you know what I mean
But I can't still focus on anything

10:32pm: I missplaced your face in the shape of a smile
On a night that could never surprise me
So tell me your afraid of the past
Its only the future that's hidden at last
You're kidding yourself, kidding yourself
You're going nowhere and you're going there fast.

You said something, you said something stupid like
Loves steals us from lonliness
Happy birthday, are you lonely yet?





today was an odd day.


college comp is kicking my ass.


karate is as well, but it's alright i guess.


i wish that i never had school, only weekends.

2:46pm: is it bad that i'm being a bitch to my ex, when all i want to do is be friends with him? I mean, i guess it's kind of getting back at him for being an ass to me in the past weeks. but. i dunno if i should feel bad. because i don't really.

these past two days have been odd.

i didn't get any homework done. not that i had much. but. 2 college comp papers. and i don't know what to write about. at all. i've tried. but it sucks. they're both due on friday. and i have two paragraphs that suck more than anything for one of them, and nothing, not even the glimmer of an idea for the other one.

how the hell did you guys deal with all this crap when you were seniors?




you can all just kiss off into to the air
behind my back
i can see them stare
they'll hurt me bad but i won't mind
they'll hurt me bad they do it all the time

::dances off::

10:32pm: Noah got me flowers.

Karate kicks my ass every night.

my ipod is still broken.

myspace is being an ass hole so i can't check my message.

there is a ridiculously large flap of skin coming off of my toe. wtf?

my dad didn't give me my allowance, so now i can't have my girly date with lauren tomorrow, which makes me real sad.

but i still get to go to see firefly again with emily. assuming i don't forget and spend all my money on food...

i think that we should go back to the trading bartering system.

i could trade my spiffy gel pens for a girly date.

i really need to take a shower...

10:50am: I'll keep you my dirty little secret (dirty little secret)
Don't tell anyone
Or you'll be just another regret (just another regret)
Hope that you can keep it
My dirty little secret

Who has to know?


hehehe.


"Its the well-behaved children, madam, that make the most formidable revolutionaries. They don't say a word, they don't hide under the table, the eat only one piece of chocolate at a time. But later on they make society pay dearly. Watch out for good boys."

10:21pm: :-\ it's never gunna happen.



and by the way. gargoyles is back on fucking TV. it's fucking awesome. this show is my fucking childhood.


everyone should watch it.

6:42am: I think that this may be the first time since the beginning of school that there has been no one in the powder room. it's very quiet, and i could be writing so many papers. well. no i couldn't... but yeah.

I think that a contributing factor to the emptyness is the fact that the majority of the sophmore class is at the farm science review. making me real jealous.

i'm bored.

Wayne's n ot giving me back my paper yet 'cause he hasn't graded it. but it's due by three. and i want to make it a Q. which i doubt it will be. poo.

I need to find something better to do with my time.

6:55am: what a dumb ho.

11:09pm: I miss cuddling.

11:19pm: my tea smells like flowers.